Monkey My Son |

The Easy

October 8, 2012 By Alison 107 Comments

This blog is for my children.

It’s for me too, but mostly, it’s for my boys.

It’s their baby book which in-real-life, I never got round to doing.

I want to fill it with memories, milestones, stories.

I want them to see it all – even the hard.

I’ve been writing a lot about the hard lately. I’ve had to dig deep to get through the days.

But it’s not hard because the boys are difficult.

No, it’s hard because this parenting thing? This making sure that the children are well and happy, and it’s all on my shoulders to make sure of that? The scariness of oh-my-god-I-cannot-screw-this-gig-up? The sinking feelings of not-enough-hours-in-a-day? Yes, those are the hard parts.

But the boys? My children? The pieces of my heart?

They are the easy.

Like the littlest who is 5 months old today.

Who can roll in all directions (and does, often), who stays seating up by himself for a little while, who has little teeth coming through.

Who has a ready smile and an infectious giggle. Who loves his tummy rubbed and his head stroked.

Who brightens up when he sees his brother or me. Who grabs my fingers at every opportunity.

And the toddler, who told me just the other morning, “Love you!”, both hands on my face.

Who comes up to me at random times of the day just to hug me. Who still likes to cuddle when he’s sleepy.

Who adores his baby brother and loves being with him.

Who points out colors of everything and counts them all. Who sings the Alphabet Song and Alouette all through the day.

Yes, they are the easy.

They are the reason I wake up in the morning, to do better, to be better.

They are the reason motherhood rocks.

What do you love about parenting?

Galit and I will be giving away a Signazon product of your choice in this month’s Memories Captured! Signazon offers decals, window decals, yard signs, car magnet signs, and congratulations banners, so mark your calendar for October 15th, and make one of these, yours!

Filed Under: Monkey My Son, Motherhood, Parenting, Scrumplet

It’s Not You, It’s Me

September 26, 2012 By Alison

May to August of this year was hard.

It was also joyful, scary, beautiful, fun, frustrating, full of laughter and tears, and a huge learning curve.

I shared a lot of the good stuff here.

Not so much the not-so-good times.

I was tired, angry, frustrated, and at times, at my wit’s end.

There was yelling. There was screaming. There were tears. There were tantrums. There were timeouts.

Yeah, the toddler had a couple of those too.

The fatigue made me feel foggy most days.

It also made me impatient.

Which meant every little thing made me angry.

The toddler trying to hit his brother on the head. The toddler pulling on the baby’s legs while he was nursing. The toddler jumping up and down and talking loudly while the baby was trying to sleep. The toddler pulling me along to do things when my hands were full. The toddler not cooperating when I needed him to nap-oh-god-please-nap.

I reacted by snapping. By threatening timeouts. By not smiling. By not being fun.

I wasn’t nice to be around.

Which is no wonder that my son, my heart, was having a challenging time.

I had forgotten that his life had been turned upside down. At the tender age of 2.

I took things he did, personally. I was, “Why are you doing this to me? Why are you being belligerent? Why won’t you listen? Why don’t you understand??”

We were having a hard time. A very hard time.

He retreated to his grandparents home, where he’d been going almost every day since he was a baby.

It was probably a relief for him to be there.

There he stayed for a couple of weeks, while I regrouped.

I had time to think, room to breathe.

And I realized this ….

My son, it’s not you, it’s me.

Source: pinwords.com via Alison on Pinterest

You didn’t do this to me. You didn’t choose to have all that you know, changed. You had no idea, just as I didn’t, how different life would be.

I’m 36, and it was hard for me. You’re just 2 and something. So little.

I could have chosen to act differently.

I could have chosen patience, smiles, said yes, gave you more time, more of me.

I could have given more hugs and I love yous.

I could have seen that you did not mean to anger me, you just wanted (and needed) attention.

I could have ignored the messes and the minor inconveniences.

I can’t turn back time though. I can’t take away those three months.

I can however, learn from it. And I am (although yes, a work-in-progress still).

The past few weeks have seen such a turnaround in the both of us. Calmer, happier, smilier.

I’ve also learned that you’re forgiving, adaptable and resilient, my not-so-baby-boy.

I’m so glad we’ve kissed and made up.

What has your child taught you lately?

Linking with Shell of Things I Can’t Say for Pour Your Heart Out.

Courtney of Courtney Kirkland blog is compiling a list of the real top 100 bloggers. Who do you think are fabulous and whose writing deserves a larger audience? Let Courtney know by emailing her! More details on The Real 100 here!

Filed Under: Monkey My Son, Motherhood, Parenting, Toddler Tagged With: Transitions are hard

Why Yes, That’s A Tent In My Living Room

September 7, 2012 By Alison

Remember I mentioned that the toddler was at his grandparents for a little while? And I got a lot of one on one time with the baby?

He came home this week.

Of course, being the awesome parents that we are, we welcomed him with this.

Oh hello toddler

Because we live in a high rise building. Because we don’t have a backyard. So we have a tent in our living room.

Just kicking back, Mama

Because, obviously.

I’m moving in

All 2 1/2 year olds need a tent. To hang out in. To contain the 50 plastic balls that come with said tent.

See those plastic balls?

Did I mention there are balls that come with the tent? Why not? It’s great exercise you know, all that bending and stretching and running around to pick up colorful plastic balls that go everywhere including under the couch.

Clever Papa put those velcro straps in

Also? Mamas are not allowed into said tent unless invited. I may be making a Stay Out sign soon.

Tents are awesome

There’s a tent in my living room.

I would not want it any other way.

Linking up with My Time As Mom and Mama Track.

How do YOU know you live with children? I’m writing a blog post next week about that with YOUR input, so head on over to my Facebook page and comment with your blog name and URL so I can include you!