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I wrote about blogging burnout a few weeks ago.
In that post, I promised myself that I would cut down on posting per week, I would guest post less, I would be on Twitter less, not reply to every comment on my posts and not read and comment on every single blog I follow every single day.
I’ve managed to only post 4 times a week every week since that post (except for one week).
I am on Twitter only a hour here and there in the morning, and evening.
I don’t reply to all the comments on my post, only those that need one.
But…..
I still read and follow 83 blogs, and have skipped maybe a couple only.
I was still frantically fulfilling my guest post invitations, and I know it’s too much. It’s too much for me, it’s too much to ask of my readers to please click away yet again. For that, I apologize.
Last week, my husband who has never complained about the amount of time I spend on my online life, finally said to me, I think we’re talking less, you’re always on your laptop.
That was a huge reality check for me.
That my partner in life missed me. Even when I’m only a few feet away.
I’d cut back and made time for my son, but I’d forgotten my husband.
I realized I had to do less, to give more of myself to the people who matter.
And with a baby coming, I know my already stretched-thin time and energy, will be further stretched. Blogging HAS to take a backseat.
And so recently, I left, with a heavy heart, the wonderful team at Just.Be.Enough. I no longer spend time doing anything blog-related on weekends. I’m considering putting my Tips, Ideas & Advice series on ice (more on that next week). I pulled out of a few guest posts, and have decided that I will no longer guest post. At least not for the next 6 months.
I will still write here though. Four times a week. Maybe less. But less, IS more.
More or less.
Has your significant other said they wish you spent less time online?
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Agreed! I’ve just decided this as well. I wasn’t doing NEARLY as much as you, but I’m finding the toll it takes on my family is almost equal to the toll my husband’s computer games takes… and that’s a heavy price to pay. They are getting bigger, smarter, less interested in time with me… I can’t stand to miss it.
Aubrey Anne ‘s last awesome post..PTSD is not just for soldiers.
Exactly – I chose to be a SAHM BECAUSE I didn’t want to miss anything. So this, I know, is the right thing for me to do.
I have recently just started to show more interest in blogging/tweeting etc but already I can see how time consuming it can be. I often wonder how my friends can do all of this and still manage a family, home and career!! Life is busy!! I guess you have to prioritize, and I think your husband being ahead of blogging is a good choice!
It is totally all-consuming, especially if you’re new. But pace yourself, or you’ll be burnout quickly. Like me
Yes
But 80% of the year he studies, so it’s not fair to expect me to keep myself busy those times and not the other 20% 
Fair enough
Whoa! 83 blogs? How in the world?? The online connections can be addictive…but husband and kids first, for sure. I applaud your priorities. I’ll miss seeing your smiling face so much on Twitter, but you are totally doing the right thing. Hugs!
Iris ‘s last awesome post..WTF Wednesday – Struggle to the Snuggle
Thank you Iris!
I think that’s wise. I know you enjoy your online life as do most of us who blog. But we have to carve out time outside of our laptop. I know I’m trying hard to find that balance too and I feel guilty when I don’t comment. Please know that if I don’t always comment here that I’m still reading. And don’t feel obligated to comment on my blog everyday either! I love it when you do, but don’t want anyone to feel pressured. I think in posting less though, it allows people to actually miss our presence though!
Rach (DonutsMama) ‘s last awesome post..Bully Babies
First of all good on you for realizing that you need to take it easy…it’s a fact….you are EVERYWHERE my dear! Everywhere I am anyway.
Yes, my hubby mentioned a while back that I was spending too much time on the computer…so I’ve cut back. Unless he’s away…which he is now. Soooo…bring on the blog reading! (and writing).
January ‘s last awesome post..Worst Two Minutes of my Life
Okay when he’s away, it’s fair game
I’m proud of you for this.
Yes, proud.
I say yes more than I should simply because it’s easier than saying no.
Your social media world? We get all of this and we’ll be here because we love you and because your fab.
And your family? Comes first. Always.
xo
Galit Breen ‘s last awesome post..Can We Talk About Allowances?
A friend wrote in a comment to another friend who was taking a large blogging break, “Family first, Blogging second”. I agree. Take the time you need – get your balance. Less IS more!
Ann ‘s last awesome post..Thanksgiving Dinner Deconstructed – Roasted Brussels Sprouts
I need to write that down somewhere!
Yes, I try to limit my computer time when everyone is around too. My husband has made comments here and there, but usually it’s a joke.
I hope things get a bit easier for you soon!
Runnermom-jen ‘s last awesome post..On Why I’m Giving Up M&M’s…
I totally get this. I’ve felt this way lately too. I’ve unplugged more recently, but I know that it’s not enough. I know that the late hours online and the constant checking in need to stop.
Kimberly ‘s last awesome post..Make Messes Disappear
Good for you, Alison. You know that we all fully support you. I’m preparing to pull back a bit too. Tough – I know you love it, as I do. But, it’s got to be done, and I know you won’t regret it at all once you get into the new groove. Best of luck! (you don’t need to reply)
Cookie’s Mom ‘s last awesome post..Wordless(ish) Wednesday: Pretty Poses
and let us not forget how much work goes into cooking a baby.
Take care of yourself, be as kind to yourself as you are to everyone out in the blogosphere!
By Word of Mouth Musings ‘s last awesome post..Anissa Mayhew – Thankful
Good for you, and I know it is not an easy decision to make.
I know I will be never be a “big name” blog. Or that I will attract all the big sponsors for reviews and giveaways…I just cannot spend the time it takes to constantly promote, check in, tweet, read, write, check in…ugh – I spin just thinking about it. I don’t have any type of smartphone – just my home computer, so that makes it easy to stay unplugged throughout the day when I with my kids.
As a SAHM I LOVE having something that is my own. something besides dishes, laundry and children that I pour myself into. But the reality check is – as dreay as some of those day-to-day things may be: they always have to come first.
Although, being married to a shift worker, I do get pretty lucky in that department because he often works nights; so after the kids go to bed, it’s just me.
RoryBore ‘s last awesome post..Wordy Wednesday: My DigiScrap Muse/ Scrapbook Software Giveaway Reminder
I think that’s what blogging is for me – it’s something that’s just my own. But as my husband said, I tend to get a little too obsessive! So cutting back it is.
I know this is hard for you to do. Ebbs and flows though. What goes up comes down… and then goes back up again. You’ll get to your balance. I know you will.
Jamie ‘s last awesome post..rainbows only after rain
Twitter: krrobi
says:
—Mama, A.
Xx
4 times a week is A LOT. I’ve cut down to 2 times per week.
Don’t worry, we will still be waiting for you.
Life is about balance… YES! Less is definitely MORE.
Twitter: BrittanyVandy
says:
I always have to do a gut check on time spent with my husband too. And I usually end up realizing that I need to put the computer down and be married to the man I love, right here at home and be present in our relationship. You made this point beautifully and will gain so much from those extra moments living your life with your family more and posting about it a little less. Kudos to you!
Brittany {Mommy Words} ‘s last awesome post..Weekly Blog Planner {Free Printable}
Thank you for understanding, Brittany! You are so right, being present is so important.
I am writing this comment well past midnight because I tried not to let blogging cut into my family life. I am so happy you are cutting back, because I care about you. Selfishly I am a bit sad, I love reading your Just.Be.Enough posts. But I am happy you are slowing down. Also unrelated but: I dreamed I took your maternity photos last night.
Stasha ‘s last awesome post..Autumn in my neighborhood
I wish your dream could be a reality. Do you think you can fly here the next 3 months to take my pictures?
As much as we all love your posts and wonderful comments, we love you more!
You are making the right decisions, it is all about priority’s. And believe me, kids grow up way too fast, you will have all the time in the world to clickity clack away on your computer. All in due time!
Hugs!
Mirjam ‘s last awesome post..What’s in a name?
I’ve had a similar conversation with my hubby a few months back. That’s why I’ve cut back and try not to blog when he is around
. It’s going to get tougher when the second kid comes along. I think you’ve made a wise decision here.
Kiddothings ‘s last awesome post..Parenting As A Malaysian
Sometimes you just have to pull away. It’s necessary. We have had this talk before – however ours is a little bit different since he’s so involved in social media as well – it’s more of a “we” both retort to our laptop’s too much. We have both cut back a lot. I am rarely online on the weekends & I’m trying to only post 2-3 times per week. I have reached major burnout!
You’re burnout too?? Well, I think cutting back to 2-3 times/ week and no blogging on weekends is gonna help you.
What a wonderful perspective. As for our family, we are never on the computer while our son is awake. His time is priority. After he goes to bed at 8 – we are both on the computer – replying to emails, blogs, etc. until around 9 or 10 pm when the computers go off in the house and we spend time as a couple. Talking, watching movies and being a couple (not parents). I might not get as much done as I would like “online” but our relationship is worth so much more.
Barbara ‘s last awesome post..31 weeks
Yes, I’m not on the laptop when my son is around. Which is why I’m always writing after 8pm when he goes to bed!
I just started following you, but I have to say: this sounds like awesome advice from you to…you. And all of us. Those people in our lives are so important and precious – we have to make them #1!
Mel ‘s last awesome post..Say What?
Thank you Mel. I do hope you stick around – I’ll still be writing, just less
I just want to say a hearty congratulations on listening to your spouse and making the important change that you needed to make. That’s true partnership.
Virginia ‘s last awesome post..A punch in the gut, every time
Brian has asked me to stop spending so much time on the computer.
Because of our discussions I do not use the computer until out daughter is in bed (I do use my phone though shhh) and I do not blog on weekends.
I do read blogs when she naps on weekends but that is when he goes outside do putter so it works out.
I didn’t realize how much time it would take up when I started but I have explained to him that it is my passion. It’s how I relieve anxiety and connect with other women.
He gets it… sometimes.
I think I need to explain that to my husband – that writing is my passion and the blog is something that’s all my own. That is, if he still thinks I’m online too much even after all this cutting down
I’ve had that same conversation with my wife . . . and I’ve pulled back.
I still have a very, very hard time saying “no” to a guest post. I designate writing time – and that means that I’ll respond to comments and/or write posts during it . . . if something falls outside of those lines, it doesn’t get done. And if that means I respond to comments a week late (like I did this week), well, then, so be it.
John ‘s last awesome post..Where I fast forward 72 hours to my next marathon
I too, have a hard time saying no. Which is why I had to come out and say, no more guest posts. So that people won’t ask
I think you’ve got a great system going on there.
I too have felt that I spend too much time on th einternet, blogging, reading blogs, Fb, all of it. I have to take steps away every once in awhile otherwise I feel swallowed by it all. Your family has to come first, every time.
Jaime ‘s last awesome post..I Need an Intervention
You bring up some FANTASTIC points.
I know you are pregnant. But, my husband and I started drinking to save our marriage. Nothing major, just one drink a night. It makes us talk. ALOT.
Don’t be sad! It’s all good!
The more you are happy in your real life the more your blog will thrive!
The transition from 1 child to 2 is very daunting before it happens (I remember being shit-scared – how will I handle 2 when I’m already tapped out NOW? etc.) –> but you will find your footing and before you know it you will have a schedule and some time to yourself, and to blog.
Yep – you’ve made some really good decisions here…!
Ado ‘s last awesome post..My Friend Megan
I know my husband says the same thing to me too…I try not to be on it when he is home…but that is hard b/c that’s also when baby is sleeping!
Natalie ‘s last awesome post..The Kroger Chronicles Continue
You made some great decisions here. Family comes first! I used to blog late at nights so my family has my full attention during the day, but too many late nights eventually tired me out. I cut back quite a lot and have been happier. So have my kids and husband!
Having said that, I do miss keeping up with blog friends and I do try checking in as much as I can, even though I can’t comment all the time.
Congrats for #2!
Mama, Hear Me Roar ‘s last awesome post..It ain’t over when you think it’s over
Yeah I cannot keep up with the late nights either, so I stopped trying!! I think you’ve done the right thing there.
We all have to do what is best for us and for our families.
Jessica ‘s last awesome post..Kids Talkin’ Turkey
My husband has never outright said, “I think you’re spending too much time online,” but he’s hinted at it.
As it is, I’m in the middle of a self-imposed blogging break, and I’m loving it. Not so much that I won’t return, but enough that I might take an extra week from the two weeks I’d originally planned. It’s been really nice to get back to basics… even if “basics” just means vegging out in front of the TV at night.
Kristin @ What She Said ‘s last awesome post..I’m Stockpiling Canned Goods (And So Should You)
So glad you’re having a good break!
Oh my girl, good for you.
Good for them.
Good for everyone.
All will be well.
XO
julie gardner ‘s last awesome post..Today call me recruited
In answer to your question, yes he has. And when he has, I shut my laptop in the same second.
We all need to spend less time online at times and that is SO okay. I commend you for knowing your limitations.
And still “squee”ing for you that baby #2 is on the way!!
Elaine ‘s last awesome post..Falling
Squee!
It’s probably an awesome time for you to slow down a little more and spend time with your sweetie. When the new baby comes, you’ll both be glad you did. (BTW…I keep thinking about how excited y’all must be about your growing family!)
jacqui ‘s last awesome post..Did You Think I Wouldn’t Notice?
Good for you. It’s so tough. I don’t do nearly as much as you do, but I also pay the price. So be it.
Robin @ Farewell, Stranger ‘s last awesome post..One Mom’s Perspective
Good for you Alison…I truly think that you will feel lighter and happier….I took a mini break for two weeks and didn’t post everyday and was amazed at a) how much I got done and b) I didn’t feel burned out fr writing! I’ve never been asked to spend less time on the computer BUT I have asked him. It’s definitely finding a balance and not so easy to do. If anyone can do it, you can!
Erica ‘s last awesome post..I Hugged A “Someone” Today. And He Cried.
Thank you for your confidence in me!
My husband has been telling me this since I’ve started blogging. And I really don’t spend that much time blogging anymore. I did at one time, however. At one time, I was always at my computer, always stressed about comments and writing posts and networking and blah, blah, blah. My husband then suggested I stop spending so much time at it, that it wasn’t paying our bills or anything for that matter. So I did. Not just because of him, but for my daughter (I only had one at the time), and me. I was exhausted. I guess, even now, my husband remembers that time, so whenever I even look at a computer screen, he assumes I’m blogging. *sigh.
Jessica ‘s last awesome post..News and Announcements
Thank you again for all you have done to help my blogging. It is so important to have a balance in life. I have learned much from reading how you work to achieve it.
JDaniel4′s Mom ‘s last awesome post..Read.Explore.Learn.- Veterans Day
You’re always so generous with your kind comments, Deirdre! Thank you for being so supportive.
I’ve been meaning to come over here and yell at you for replying to my last two comments. If you reply to this one – I’m flying over and taking your laptop hostage.
Well and I will probably steal 12 pairs of shoes too.
xoxo
tracy@sellabitmum ‘s last awesome post..She Talks With Her Eyes..
I’m replying to this because I actually do want to fly over here!
LOL – Now I would love to do that also. xoxo
tracy@sellabitmum ‘s last awesome post..She Talks With Her Eyes..
I truly think this is a great idea. Not because I want to see less of you in the blogosphere but because it’s what you need to do for you and you need to put yourself first. We will all be here whether you are around 1 hour or 20 hours a week.
Jessica ‘s last awesome post..How to Fall
I’m taking your advice from your Theta Mom post!
Alison, I know how difficult it was for you to make those decisions… but you are also right to do so because no matter what, your husband, your son, and your little precious one need you. I have every confidence that you will be able to find a new balance between blogging, family time, and preparing for the arrival of your new baby
Sweaty ‘s last awesome post..Thoughtful Thursday Blog Hop
Oh I do hope so!! Maybe if I sleep less?
Wait, I already do that
The weekends are our family time- and you will VERY rarely find me online then. I might tweet something whiel we’re out and about, but I usually don’t even turn my computer on during the weekends, unless it’s to let one of my boys play on it.
Usually, I get off the computer by about 8 or 9 every night.
This puts me “behind” but… well… I just need to.
And this week in particular has been really hard. Hubs was gone all week and my Bear had the worst week ever in school and other problems. So, I barely responded to anything and haven’t read blogs(other than the PYHO links) since Monday. Taking care of my family had to come first.
We all have to figure out a balance for ourselves.
There is my book in your comments.
Shell ‘s last awesome post..Things They Can’t Say: The Adventures of Daddy Runs a Lot
Thank you for your book Shell! I’m continuously amazed by how you do it all.
So sorry for your tough week, I hope it evens out next week.
glad you are taking time for you & your partner. I am struggling a bit with balancing everything out. My husband is the same way though – works all the time so for now i think this is our balance. one day we will find the perfect one – i hope you find yours soon!
Or at least something close to perfect
I feel this way often, I have stopped blogging in the past (you know that) and then come back better, more focused, different. Right now , your family needs you, and I for one want you to be there,with them. None of us are going to fault you. MISS YOU? Of couse. WISH YOU WERE WRITING? Duh!!!
but UNDERSTAND? More than you know!!!
Our lives are outside this screen, it’s what gives us things to write about.
I know that when the time comes for you, the content we’ll get will be outstanding…and that makes me happy and PROUD to know you. xoxo
Kir ‘s last awesome post..TRDC: Comfort
Love your cupcake comments, Kir
Worry not, I’ll still be writing. Hopefully better writing, thank you for your support and confidence in me! xo
Twitter: euregirlsandboy
says:
My husband has definitely asked me to ease up on the internet time in the past – even before I started blogging! I try to be aware of it and be sure I give plenty of time to my family. But I also think of my internet time, blogging, reading blogs, twitter, facebook, etc. as my me time, and I need that, too. It’s all about balance. It sounds like you have a good plan!
Katie E ‘s last awesome post..Life’s Lessons: Smart Girls
Yes, my online time is my little world, so I’m hard-pressed to totally give up, so balance is definitely key.
Oh Alison, congrats on the baby. And yes, less is more. I did that for a while – and paid the price, I have to admit – but it felt good that the people next to me were having the quality ME they deserved and in the long run I was happy too.
I, sometimes, sneak out to my laptop but not manage to really achieve all the things I wish I could do prior to baby.
All the best mama.
Mama And The City ‘s last awesome post..How to NOT hate farmer’s market
Thank you! I hope to achieve some kind of balance – I need my blog and all that comes with it for my sanity!
Sacrifices have to be made. And in this case blogging was the sacrifice. Family always comes first…I’m glad you made that decision, it’s not always easy to cut back on one of your passions but sometimes living life is more important that blogging about it
RachelJoy ‘s last awesome post..Your Schoolaged Bed Wetter
You’re right, living life is more important than blogging about it – without living it, what is there to write about anyway?
Less is always more! Used in the right context
Great read.
Muminator ‘s last awesome post..Preparing for Santa
I can identify with this post! Thankfully my husband hasn’t ‘complain’ anything yet but I felt that I was spending too much time on my laptop and not enough time with my son and husband. So now I don’t blog weekends and try to even not reply emails on weekends unless it’s work related. Even then, I keep it to a minimal. And I so agree with Rachel there that living life is more important than blogging.. so you’ve made a wonderful decision! Btw, congrats on your No.2!! I’m praying for my No.2
Ruth ‘s last awesome post..Not Sure Where to Go this Weekend? Try the Animal Resort
Thank you Ruth! I hope you get your #2 soon
I feel like we’re on this path together. I’ve dropped back to 4 a week. And I was so busy with work this week that I read almost no blogs and was never on Twitter. I had to re-evaluate what I’m doing this for. Is it for stats? Or so my family has a wonderful record of our life? The latter, right? And that requires living the life.
Don’t write me back. Just go hug your Monkey and husband.
Mama Track ‘s last awesome post..Something to Keep You Going
Twitter: beeswithhoney
says:
Mine is a big reason I stopped blogging so much. He’s right though. He and I barely get any time to be alone when the kids are around so when they go to bed, it’s the perfect time for he and I to re-connect. I was blogging instead and it started to take a toll on the relationship. Not bad, but it would have gotten to a not-so-great place if I didn’t re-evaluate what I was doing. So now that I’ve cut down, everyone is happy, including myself
That’s where I hope we’re headed – to a happy place
So glad cutting back has worked out so well for you!
I totally get this. I recently left a job because it was taking up way too much of my time, I was stressed out, always on line trying to catch up and NOT spending enough time with kids and husband. I finally said I’ve had enough. And you know what, I feel better! I am trying to limit my time on the computer as well. It’s hard when you still have clients and business but I have learned…it will always be there. My kids – well they won’t be little forever. You are making the right decision. And yes less is more
Tina @ Life Without Pink ‘s last awesome post..Do I like being a mom to all boys? {VIDEO}
That’s right – the kids won’t be small forever, and the husband will soon run out of patience
So glad you made that tough but right decision.
Good, Alison. I’m glad you’re giving yourself this time. WELL deserved. We’ll still be here for you!
Missy | The Literal Mom ‘s last awesome post..Literal Mom Monday – A Letter to My Readers
It can be really hard to remember the person sitting next to you may be the person who needs you most.
Especially when that person is eating chili dogs and watching football in seeming nonchalance.
Living outside the computer is something we should all do more of.
KLZ ‘s last awesome post..How Not to Annoy a Pregnant Woman
Your comment made me laugh – well, the part about chili dogs and watching football
Yep, I started pulling back slowly a few weeks ago. I still babble away on Twitter throughout the day, but I’m mostly engaged with my son, husband, family and friends. Somehow I ended up with four or five guest posts in November and December, but I’ve managed to get most of them done.
It’s a great hobby, blogging, but does tend to take over if we’re not careful. I think we worry that people will be mad if we don’t comment enough, or forget about us if we don’t Tweet.
But I know the real friends I’ve made online won’t mind if I’m not the #2 comment or if I miss Wineparty. I know they are part of my real life and understand the importance of spending more time in that real life than on the keyboard.
Enjoy your remaining time as a family of three!
Julie ‘s last awesome post..Monday Meals: Talkin’ Turkey
Thank you, I most certainly will!
awwwww, I totally get this but it sounds like a break is in order for you, especially with a another baby on the way (I don’t think I knew this–congratulations!!) and a hubby who misses his other half. Do what you can and remember that you are only human!
Charlotte ‘s last awesome post..smitten
sometimes my significant other says i spend all my time on the computer. but that’s not true. sometimes i spend it watching tv too.
i will read whatever you post (usually in spurts) and i hope you don’t completely give up posting your awesome recipes, and also hope you will make my life easier if by allowing me to copy your recipes from your blog (instead of writing them down or running back and forth to the computer).
I can email you the recipes